Somedays, being a mom is the least fun thing I can think of

We haven't slept since Friday night. Madelyn is teething pretty hard right now and just won't sleep. We're up every 30 minutes to hour. I bought the No Cry Sleep Solution, but I just don't think it's going to work as long as she's teething like this. She doesn't nap anymore either and that makes her grumpy, so she cries all day. I'm ready to pull every last hair out of my head. What happened to my sweet happy smiling girl who slept all night? She disappeared at three months old and never came back.

She has cut back her daytime nursing to every 4 hours or so, but the night feeding is a nightmare. I know she could go all night without nursing, she just doesn't. She just wakes up and can't soothe herself back to sleep. She's using my like a pacifier at night, only sucking long enough to fall back asleep. I wish she would take a pacifier.

I've decided the next baby will not nurse while laying in bed with me and I'm going to make Brandon get up with the next one. Since I'm breastfeeding I thought that Brandon couldn't help me at night, so I never asked him to or made him. Now in hindsight, I wish she would accept him at night in place of me and allow him to soothe her back to sleep. Instead, she screams and cries until we give up and I take her. I don't think it would be so bad if she was waking once or twice a night, but this 6-10 times a night stuff is literally killing me. I walk around like a zombie all day every day. I can't function. I'm starting to feel resentment towards Madelyn and Brandon. I hate that I feel that way. It's causing a lot of strain on our marriage. I try not to talk about it with anyone for fear of judgment, but we really are having a hard time.

We have no time for the two of us anymore. We knew our time together would be limited once Madelyn was born, but we didn't realize that we would NEVER spend another moment alone. I imagined that she would go to bed at night and we would have some time to spend together. Not so though because she's no sleeping through the night, so 95% of the time our time together is very short lived and she's fussing again and I have to go get her. I really honestly thought this would be better by now. She's 6 months old, shouldn't things be getting easier instead of harder?